So I have to admit something, in my head when I wrote out my title, I said it in Carrie Bradshaw's voice. As much as this blog is super nerdy, I have to say that I am really a girly girl and abso-fucking-lutely (get that reference??) love Sex in the City. But enough of my digressions....(or is it??? No really it is..)
The topic at hand today, the one I have been thinking about and dealing with the past few days deals with a much more serious topic. Well and let's be honest, when I say serious I of course mean in my fake little world of role playing. Here's the skinny....on Sunday during our game my character's boyfriend died yet again. Just for those keeping track, that is twice in a month period. And now I really don't have anyway to get him back. I mean she already bargained his life for her soul with a deity and after you do that, really where do you have to go from there?!?! My thought is really no where, unless I wanted to abandon my party and become an evil bandit (which actually I do want to, but I didn't want to be a huge dickbag) and have him come back that way. Now I have to do some thinking about how my character is going to change and evolve. The whole point of going through certain things is so that you can play your character through potentially tough situations not only in terms of combat, but just general situations (*salutes*) as well. I think it would be ridiculous to play a character who went through terrible things, or really positive things, and didn't evolve. I mean it's just like how people are now. Put someone in a traumatic experience over and over and they are going to get messed up. Just in case someone hasn't really been keeping up with this character, let me tell you what has happened to her in the past MONTH...
1. A party member died
2. Her mom broke her jaw because said party member died
3. Her boyfriend dies
4. She sells her soul to an evil deity to get him to come back
5. She tells her mom that her boyfriend died and she gave up her soul and her mother beats her unconcious
6. Her mother abandons her
7. She was poisoned and physically mutilated
8. Her boyfriend dies again
9. She is taken prisoner
-I would also like to add that she has been constantly berated by older NPCs for her decision and also has been knocked unconscious several times during combat thus almost resulting in her death.
I am really at a loss for how to play her now...should she be super possessive of the people in her party or should she become withdrawn and keep to herself. Also, she is currently Chaotic Neutral alignment and has bordered on evil a few times, which is a reason why I don't think that she can just buck up and see the good (if there is any) in these situations. She also doesn't have any decent role models that are within the good alignment because all the people she knows that are good are huge ass hats to her. I really feel stuck with how to play, because obviously I don't want to retire her. I made a plan that had her boyfriend lived throughout this situation then they could have run away and become evil pirates, but instead he died and she is sticking with the party. She has never had anything positive happen to her in the game (I mean nothing...if there are cute guys they just fawn over the other girls in the party and not pay attention to her), so really there is nothing to hold her back from going down the evil drain. Then I have to think about though, if I move her to evil which evil-Chaotc or Neutral evil?? Both are obviously bad, but I personally consider Chaotic evil to be worse (for a good example think Joffrey from Game of Thrones, the Joke from Batman, or Loki from Avengers) than Neutral Evil (Cersei from Game of thrones or the Emperor from Star Wars). I mean both are pretty awful examples, but those are within the steps of alignment dropping she could take. I have thought about it and obviously I am not going to kill the party (well unless they get in my way and then she might and that would only be in an extreme case), but other than that there really aren't many things that she wouldn't do or hasn't thought about doing. I think it is just an overall not great situation to be in with a character and I wish that it would be easier to figure out what I am going to do with her. Should I keep her current alignment? Should I change to evil? Is there another option I am not thinking about???
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